In the post, I will tell you six powerful compliments to activate his love.
Let’s start by discussing why complimenting a guy is essential to you and your relationship.
1. compliments are a powerful reinforcement of his positive behavior and relationship traits.
If you want him to show up as his best self in the relationship and do the things that you love, to you, and with you, you will like to compliment him.
2. exchanging compliments is a unique and effective way to bring you and your partner closer.
It’s a type of intimate exchange that he doesn’t get anywhere else. I promise. It’s not like his buddies say, “Bro, you really inspired me with how you handled that board meeting today. You’re so courageous. You make me want to be a better man, bro.” Nope. It doesn’t happen.
Men are starved for compliments, and you are probably the only person in his life who can give him that emotional nourishment he’s not getting anywhere else.
Let’s dig into these six compliments, and I will give them to you in Mad lib style. I will provide you with the compliment with a fill-in-the-blank at the end that you can customize however you want.
Plus, I’ll give you a couple of examples to use with each one.
Among them, the last three compliments will be action acknowledgment compliments because men crave being acknowledged for their actions. I’ll give you three specific compliments and situations where they can be used most effectively.
1. You are an amazing …
The number one compliment to activate a man’s love is the identity acknowledgment compliment: “You are an amazing [blank].” You can put whatever his role is that you absolutely love in that blank. For example, “You are an amazing partner. You are an amazing father. You are an amazing writer. You are an amazing chef.”
Why is the simple compliment so powerful? Well, it’s because men, even more so than women, tend to identify themselves and create their innate value through the roles they play in their relationships and the activities they engage in.
When you use this identity acknowledgment to compliment and validate his activities and actions to which he’s attached himself, you’re validating his identity in the sense of self, which will hugely empower him.
When and how to use this compliment best is for a man who’s very busy and wears a lot of different hats in his life and maybe doesn’t get acknowledgment or praise for all those different roles he plays throughout the course of his day.
Feel free to rotate this one on a regular basis. Say one week you compliment him for being such a great father. The following week you commend him for being such a masterful chef for that memorable curry dinner that he made you the other night.
2. I love your smell
Number two, and I promise you this is a good one, even though it’s going to seem a bit random: “I love your smell.”
Why is this compliment so hot? Well, it’s hard to explain, but it comes down to evolution and biology.
I think we’re privately wired to be attracted to each other’s pheromones. When a woman says she loves how I smell or misses smelling me, it’s desirable to me and makes a man feel very magnetic to the woman he’s with.
For the record, I’m not really talking about the cologne smell. I’m talking about like the smell of his body, the scent of his skin. I actually had a girlfriend who, when I wouldn’t be able to hang out with her for several days, say if I was working or I was away on a trip, she would ask if she could borrow one of my used t-shirts so that she could have something smells like me to cuddle with at night. I thought that was sweet.
This was a favorite. This one says, “Danger, I’m a hugger.” It might seem a little weird, but it was pretty hot.
3. You make me feel … when you …
It is, “You make me feel [blank] when you [blank].”
For example, “You make me feel so safe and cherished when you hold me in your arms,” or, “You make me feel so excited when you plan our dates out way ahead of time but won’t tell me what we’re doing until you come and pick me up.”
This is one of the very best compliments you can tell a man because it is hugely empowering for him to hear and understand how he’s being or what he’s doing is impacting you emotionally.
We are not mind readers, ladies. When you let us into your heart and you let us know how we’re profoundly impacting you through the way that we’re showing up, it is incredibly activating to us.
The best time to use this compliment is any time, but it’s most potent when you and your partner are both engaged or immersed in the experience. It will amp up its intensity.
If I’m dating someone, I’m holding them, and they tell me how safe and how loved they feel in my arms, I will want to squeeze them even tighter.
4. You impressed me with …
Compliment number four is, “You impressed me with [blank].” In that blank, you’re going to put a bold action statement that he’s done towards you.
For example, “You impressed me with the way you carried me back on the hike after I felt tired last time. That was so sweet.”
Why is this compliment so great? Well, when men are emotionally investing in a woman, they’re often going to go above and beyond and over the top to try to impress her and win her over.
When you validate and acknowledge a man’s over-the-top efforts, it will validate and light him up, fulfill him on a deep level, and make him want to make more crazy romantic gestures.
Still, it’s most effective in the early courtship stages of a relationship to validate and reinforce that a man is your knight in shining armor, which will continue to build and deepen that excitement and that pursuit he’s so invested in.
5. I admire you for …
Number five is, “I admire you for [blank]. ” In that blank, you want to put a significant action, vision, or purpose statement.
For example, “I admire you for building a business around your passions, even when your mom and dad thought that you were crazy,” or, “I admire you for always putting this family first, even when your work is callous.”
Why is this compliment so effective? Well, it’s because men are craving being seen and acknowledged for the big picture of what they’re trying to do with their lives.
No matter what type of career or profession he has for his life and legacy, every man is looking to create through his actions and efforts. If you can let him know that you acknowledge and see and admire him for that pursuit, for that work he’s doing tirelessly day in and day out to accomplish that legacy and to fulfill his purpose or his destiny in the world, he’s going to feel really seen, appreciated and fulfilled in his relationship with you.
Especially if his work or the pursuit of his legacy is something that challenges him on a regular basis, your compliments can be the nourishment that keeps him going when he feels exhausted and burnt out.
The best time to use this compliment is when you notice that he’s had a tough day, seems exhausted, or maybe a little lost in pursuing his vision. This can be a clarifying and empowering thing you can give him when he needs it the most.
6 I adore you for …
Number six is, “I adore you for [blank]. ” In that blank, you want to put a small action statement.
For example, “I adore you for never letting us go to sleep in argue. You always ensure we resolve whatever’s going on before we sleep.” Or another example is, “I adore you for always playing with the kids when you get home from work, no matter how tired you are.”
Why is this such a good compliment? Because it demonstrates that you are paying attention to his small behaviors and daily habits that he’s going out of his way to do.
Many men honestly feel like they are being taken for granted. A little bonus about regularly using this small action compliment is that if you’re consistently acknowledging him for the little things he’s doing in his day that make you feel good, he’s going to be more prone to notice and acknowledge you for those same little things that you’re doing for him.
It becomes a mirroring situation if you do it regularly.
When do you want to use this small action compliment? You want to use it whenever he does the activity, either during or immediately after, so it feels organic and alive to him.
If you do it too far afterward, he will look at you like, “Well, why didn’t you tell me at the time?” He’s going to ask, “Are you trying to butter me up because you want to ask me for something?”
Conclusion
Ladies, if you use these six compliments authentically and consciously with your partner or any guy you’re looking to get to know, it will activate him and empower him to step up, be more of the man you want, and deepen his love and attachment to you. Let’s review them now.
[Related Post: 4 Detailed Ways To Inspire A Man’s Love]
1. “You are an amazing [blank].”
“You are an amazing partner, husband, father, or driver.” Whatever role that he plays that you know is critical to him, you want to acknowledge him for that and let him know how amazed and in awe you are.
One of the most empowering and validating things you can do to a man is acknowledge him for the roles that he identifies himself with in his life, both in his relationship with you and just in the activities he engages in on a day-to-day basis.
He will love it if he’s passionate about it, and you acknowledge him for that.
2. “I love your smell.”
I don’t necessarily mean cologne smell or deodorant smell, or shampoo smell. You want to acknowledge the scent of who he is, his pheromonal essence. That is powerful, primal, and hot for a guy to hear.
3. “You make me feel [blank] when you [blank].”
You want to tie a positive feeling to an action that he’s doing.
Few things empower a man more than knowing that what he’s doing or how he’s showing up is impacting your heart and how you feel about him and yourself.
For example, “You made me feel so loved when you stood up for me at the bar when that other lady was rude.” You want to use that compliment in the middle of the experience to amplify the intensity of that moment that the two of you were sharing.
4. “You really impressed me with [blank].”
In that blank, you’re going to put a significant, bold, over-the-top action that he’s done to try to win your heart. For example, “You really impressed me when you called all over town to find the one Thai restaurant that I haven’t been to yet and got us the last table.”
Remember, when you validate a man’s over-the-top courting, it will make him feel like a knight in shining armor and make him want to sweep you onto his steed and gallop off into the sunset.
5. “I admire you for [blank].”
In that blank, you’ll put a comprehensive action statement or something around his vision or purpose.
When you compliment a man on his vision and purpose, you’re nourishing his soul and giving him the fuel he needs to overcome whatever obstacles he may face as he goes out there to create his legacy.
6. “I adore you for [blank]. “
Insert a small action statement like, “I adore you for how consistently you clean the gutters every week,” or, “I adore you for always holding the door for me, even if it’s not date night. We’re at the grocery store, and you’re doing it. That touches my heart so much.”
This robust emotional validation for small habitual actions that he’s doing lets him know that you’re not taking them for granted and that you want him to keep doing them.
